The Process

A Safe Space

I offer a safe, supportive space in which you can talk about what’s really going on in your life.  When we create space for another guy it usually means not talking about what’s really going on. When you want to grow and transform you need to explore what can feel vulnerable and to do this you need a safe space. This includes 100% confidentiality.

Full Openness

I welcome all of you—body, mind, experiences, beliefs and emotions. Every man has stuff he’s ashamed of, makes him feel small or not enough. And we have dreams, hopes, and desires we’re afraid to speak or truly hold. Transformation is sparked when you speak your deepest truths. This turns shame and fear into belonging and strength.

Witness and Encouragement

There’s something special that happens when there’s a witness to your spoken desire for change. For example, something that’s bothered you for decades doesn’t have that emotional charge for the witness. In that moment you see and feel that what you thought was inevitable in how you feel isn’t. A different, freer path opens up for you.

Deep Conversation

Deep conversation is an active exploration and discovery of what’s alive in you. In deep conversation you connect beliefs and feelings, your adult present with your childhood past, and memories with reactive behaviours you don’t understand. You connect body sensations (a tight chest, bad back, bladder problems) with emotions.

In deep conversation you’re like an astronaut, except instead of going into deep space, it’s inner space exploration. You “return to Earth” with a new view of yourself – and what’s possible.

Empowerment

Every man comes to life coaching with a specific issue, from a difficult relationship to a stuck entrepreneurial dream, fathering and friend challenges to problems with parents. Below the issue is the bedrock. This is where we’ll work because it’s the realm of your power. Our goal isn’t to solve one issue. It’s to tune you into your calm, centered self so you operate from integrity and purpose in all parts of your life.

A Toolkit Approach

I use a holistic, experience-based toolkit approach informed by a variety of somatic, emotional and cognitive coaching techniques. These include my work in Men’s Emotional Leadership Development (MELD), dream and shadow work, my experience of recovery, men’s work neurobiology, experiential learning, wilderness-based healing and hospice care. Major influences in my approach are leaders in men’s life coaching and personal development, including Terry Real, Owen Marcus, James Hollis, Connor Beaton, Dr. Robert Glover and Carl Rogers.